{god is great, beer is good & people are crazy}

has anyone seen that wal-mart commercial about the troops coming home?! ohh god. it’s a real tear jerker. kudos, wal-mart. maybe i’ll shop there more than 5 times this year.

in lieu of election day, today i will share my political thoughts with you. this will be the only time. as the election comes to a close, i remember what i look for in candidates. i simply look for a candidate that will eliminate the following things to get this nation back on track:

1. people who don’t use their blinkers. and people who ignore the fact that their lane is ending. and people who don’t drive the speed limit when weather is permitting.

2. taylor swift. actually, i’ll give anyone who reads this $100 if they don’t hear taylor swift or adam levine on the radio today.

3. lazy people. off the island.

4.paying your bills and then getting screwed? how does this make sense?

5. people at the grocery store that don’t write the number on their bag of treats they get from the bulk section, and then wonder why it takes the poor cashier so long. again, see number 3.

6. doc martens. especially men wearing doc martens. no.

7. bad tippers.

8. facebook complainers.

9. wind pants.

10. those damn family stickers on the back of vehicles.

no, seriously though. i don’t understand why we, as americans, have created such a sense of entitlement. maybe all my paleo research has got me thinking about cavemen and survival of the fittest, but i just don’t get it.  it seems to me that americans are so oblivious to everyone else around them, while the rest of the world watches us so closely. i think americans need some sort of wake-up call- like for instance,  i think we should just drop everyone off in europe and/or asia and make them find their own way back home to the US. ya know really learn some lessons, take the time to reflect about how lucky we really are. anyways, that’s all. conan o’brien for president.

{red.white. & blue}